As a reminder, Suarez bit an opponent, Otman Bakkal, in a match vs. PSV last week. Or at least he appeared to try, giving him a quick nip on the neck. As bizarre as that accident was, he didn’t cause Bakkal any real injury, and the game went on without him getting sanctioned. Upon further review, however, the Dutch FA have come down hard on the Uruguayan, and have given him a punishment that is more than double-long for a direct red card. It’s an even longer punishment than if he had elbowed someone in the face, or accidentally broken someone’s foot. I guess the message they are trying to send is to keep the weird stuff off the field.

Suarez has apologized, and claimed that Bakkal had consistently been stepping on his shoes during the match, which caused his retaliation. Still no word on why he chose to bite him – maybe he thought that a shove or a punch would be viewed as more serious? If so, the choice has backfired greatly.

One bonus for Suarez is that he has two months off to watch all the vampire movies he can get his hands on.

Some fans of AC Milan forward Zlatan Ibrahimovic may not know that his skills extend beyond the football field into martial arts, but the Swedish starman has a black belt in taekwondo. He has been working on this accomplishment for years, and is well-renown amongst him teammates as the man not to mess with.

Despite this, reports say that his teammate, US defender Oguchi Onyewu got into a fight with him during a practice match. It was apparently a big fight that needed their Milan teammates to separate the two, but there were no major injuries. The incident has long since been forgotten, but if one were to guess, Zlatan probably would have won the fight.

In a related incident, you can see the striker hitting a teammate of his with a kick during training session. It appears to be a slight incident, or at least not made with an intention to harm. One wonders if Zlatan does this often, and how funny his teammates find his martial arts antics to be, but it’s clear he has the confidence to do much of what he wants.

Milan fans will also hope he continues his decent form for the Italian giants, which has not been characterized by a many goals, but he has done his part since coming on loan from Barcelona. Super-kicking them into the Champions League knockout round will be an added bonus too.

Arguably Manchester City’s most important player, Carlos Tevez, is said to be visting a psychiatrist to help him battle homesickness. This is nothing new, as Tevez has repeatedly expressed how much he misses his home in Argentina, but there have been different reports regarding how bad his condition is. Some went as far as to suggest he’s ready to quit the club and football in general in the summer, which would indeed be quite shocking.

I do not believe it will go that far, though, the fact that he is seeking help and going to a professional is proof that he’s trying to overcome his condition. He visited this doctor while he was receiving treatment for his knee back home, which has kept him out of action for three weeks. As he is such a vital aspect of City’s game, they will hope he can put both his psychical and emotional problems behind. At 26 years of age, it would be an incredibly sad thing if such a talent can’t continue on with his game. (as long as you don’t ask United fans of course)

It serves as a reminder that footballers are not confined to a world of constant training and playing, where they can think of little else. In a much more severe case, it’d be good to remember the former German international and Hannover keeper Robert Enke who took his own life last year after failing to overcome his depression.

Sometimes you have to wonder weather some players are just cursed by the footballing Gods, and that’s that. Owen Hargreaves had been missing from the Manchester United line-up since September, after battling a long-term knee injury, and today in their match vs. Wolves he finally returned. His comeback had been in the news for a while, and fans had been anticipating to see the former English star in action, but niggling injuries always delayed his return. Today he finally started a game for United…but limped out after 6 minutes with a hamstring injury.

The good news for him is that it is not a knee injury again, so if things go well he should be healed in a few weeks, but this has to be a huge blow for him. It’s not just the physical preparation that’s at stake here, mentally this has to be even worse. To wait 2 years for a return, and to have it end so suddenly and unexpectedly can bring down even the toughest of individuals. The difference between a good footballer player and someone who can kick a ball moderately well is often the mental determination, and Hargreaves will have to dig deep again in other regain his momentum.

One can only wish him well, but by now it would be a hue achievement to see him last 90 minutes in a first team-match, let alone see him regain his form and challenge for a place in the national side again.

Apparently, all this started when Cassano refused to go to an awards presentation, which is said to have insulted the president of Sampodria. Cassano was told to hand in a written apology, but refused, and no talks between the club and the player have since been enough to amend the situation. Rumors are Cassano stayed at home to take care of his pregnant wife, which would be an entirely understandable excuse. And yet, president Garrone does not want to let this go, and Cassano has been frozen out of the squad, awaiting his contract terminated.

Surely there must be something else going on behind the scenes. Otherwise, it would be absurd to fire anyone, let alone your star player, because he missed a ceremony to take care of his wife. Tempers can get out of control, but it’d be hard to believe the club have so little regard for their own players that they would act in this way.

In any case, if/when Cassano does end up leaving the club, many of Europe’s top teams will be more than happy to take him in board.

As we saw in the past week how much power modern footballers have, it’s nice to see them using it in a positive way every once in a while. Rising Argentinean superstar Javier Pastore , who plays for Serie A side Palermo, has rejected interest from the top European clubs like Real Madrid, Barcelona, Manchester United, saying that he’s found his “perfect place” and sees no reason to leave.

Most other players would cite “personal ambition” and a need for trophies as their reason for leaving for those big teams, but Palermo have said that not even 60 million euros would be enough for their young star. Pastore has agreed with that, citing that he has the “environment to grow here and the experiences players to help me.”

It has almost become a distant dream for a middle-of the-road club to get to hold on to its star players when the richer clubs come knocking, but Palermo have managed that, and were rewarded with an excellent 5th-placed finish in he Serie A last year, just missing out on the Champions League. They are also doing pretty well in the Europa League this season, and are looking to aim even higher.

The only thing extra they can hope for now is that these promises don’t suddenly change when January comes along. It has certainly happened before in the past. It’s up to Pastore to keep his word.

Claudio Pizarro has become the highest-scoring foreigner in the history of the Bundeslia after scoring in Werder Bremen’s impressive 4-1 away victory to Borussia Moenchengladbach. This was his 134th goal, which broke the record by Brazilian Giovane Elber, who scored his 133 goals for Stuttgart and Bayern Munich a decade ago.

It is a well deserved achievement for Pizarro, who has also played for Bayern since coming to the Bundesliga in 1999. In between those spells he also tried his luck at Chelsea, but it became clear that he could not cut it there, so he returned to Germany.

Though then there’s a player like Christiano Ronaldo who can’t stop scoring no matter where he plays, but then that’s why he’s one of the very best in the world.

Some may question whether that means the Bundesliga is a much easier league to score at than the Premiership, but I don’t think it works that way. Different leagues have different teams and tactics, and some players are more suited to one over the other. There aren’t many that can make the switch easily. Some quite successful English players, like Darius Vassel and Robbie Fowler, have failed to recapture their goalscoring form despite at one time leading the charts in England. Thierry Henry when he switched from Arsenal to Barcelona is another good example. Some players thrive under one system, and chose wise to stick to it.

The headlines this past week were filled with rumors and statements from Wayne Rooney and Sir Alex Ferguson regarding the England’s striker future at Manchester United, but at the end of the day he signed a new five-year deal and will stay at the club.

Before that he had shocked all of Old Trafford by saying that he is leaving, stating a “lack of reassurance about the future quality of the squad”. That’s right. Rooney wanted to leave because he felt the likes of Evra, Vidic, Giggs, Nani, Berbatov etc. were so far beneath him that he deserved a better club. He did not believe that United were good enough to challenge for trophies in the near future.

It sounds almost absurd to type that out, but apparently that’s how highly Rooney thinks of himself. A player who had one very good season at United after Ronaldo left, and since then has been delivering decent games for his club and country on a depleting basis. It just goes to show you how much power the modern day footballer has that he can say such things and think himself so much better than any club, let alone Manchester United.

To his credit, Rooney has since apologized to his manager, teammates and fans, which is still more than what others would do. Weather that will be enough to put all bad feelings aside is questionable, but the power structure in football needs to change, that much is clear.

One of the strangest news stories you’ll hear all week in any sport has to be the condition Bordeaux midfielder Yoan Gouffran has developed. The 24 year-old footballer has become allergic to grass, which has to be one of the funniest (not if you’re him of course) conditions you can develop as a footballer. After all, most football pitches, especially in France, use real grass.

His manager, Jean Tigana, admitted that such a thing is “embarrassing” for a footballer, but the good thing is that this certainly is not the end of his career. Gouffran will have to meet with an allergist in order to find the best way to treat his condition, though that will also depend on how severe the problem is. He also has luck that he developed this allergy after he became a successful footballer, as many kids who starts out will most likely quit if they get such bad fortune.

In the modern age, however, many such things are treatable. Some footballers wear special contact lenses for their eyes, other more popular accessories include Petr Cech’s black headgear, and Edgar David’s goggles. Didier Drogba was given permission to play at this summer’s World Cup finals with a plaster cast for his arm. So as long as there is some practical solution, which may even simply be stronger medication, Bordo fans don’t have to fear losing one of their more important players. One thing’s for sure though – Gouffran won’t be the kissing the ground in celebration again.

Some managers seem to have their “special” sort of player whose qualities only they seem to be able to understand, while the rest of the fan base questions what on Earth they are doing picking them. For England coach Fabio Capello, that man has to be Emile Heskey. After the World Cup, the Aston Villa striker graciously retired from international football, leaving most of the country wondering what he was doing there in the first place. Capello, however, doesn’t seem to take no for an answer, and has pleaded with him to return.

Thankfully (for most England fans), Heskey has declined, which shows that at least he has some sense. You would think Capello would be acting so desperate if all of England’s strikers were injured, but in fact it’s only Jermain Defoe that is on the injury list. Rooney, Crouch, Bent, Carlton Cole, Carrol – are all available and hoping for a chance, but the Italian specialist deems them so unworthy that he has to beg Heskey to come back.

It’s curious, though, that for his stature, Capello hasn’t been too successful in persuading players to come back. Heskey refused, Scholes refused, Carragher only accepted for the World Cup…and a number of players have retired before their time on his watch. His reputation really has taken a hit due to England’s failure this summer, and he’ll have to rebuild it the long and hard way. Sadly, he’ll have to do it without Emile Heskey.